Every summer so far, give or take a year, my husband and I have a family campout, where both sides of our families get together for fun, laughter, games, and good food. A chance for Mike and I to have as many of our children with us as possible. Since the day Mike I got married, my daughters, except Raelyn, accepted Mike as my new husband. In time, he earned the trust and love of my daughters. Mike always said that being a step-father was just as important as being a natural father. To this day, my daughters call him "Dad". He feels rich in many ways for his relationship with "His" girls (as he calls them). On my end though, Mike brought three sons into our relationship. I don't think, even today, that his sons have ever accepted me. I don't ever want to take their mom's place but I wish they could understand it is okay to love more than one person. If not love then it's okay to have a friend in their dad's wife. But I also understand that my husband's relationship with his sons is kind of volatile. It has been that way for along time from what I understand. This is frustrating to me because I raised my daughters that family is everything. Even when my ex-husband was not so much involved with the family, I taught them to still respect their dad. I tried to carry that on even after the divorce, not always successful because of hurt feelings, etc. But today I see the wisdom when the psychologists tell divorcing parents to not say bad things about the other parent in front of the kids. As far as my relationship with Mike's sons...I would have to say I am hurt, I haven't done anything to them accept open my own home up to two of his sons so they had a place to live and I feel my home and myself was disrespected. It has gotten to where I have a hard time trusting...I look on their FB pages for some kind of acknowledgement that I am related...somehow or how I have touched one of their life's, or even a thank you for helping out when it was needed or thanks for the good times and nothing. Maybe I am just opening myself up for the hurt. I just hope and pray that one day, and it maybe many moons down the road, that they realize that Diane is not as half bad as others say. I don't want to be their step-mom...I just want to be Diane...married to Mike. I matter and I have feelings that run deep. So for now, I am stepping back...way back from Mike's side of the family. I am tired of feeling like the bad guy or unwanted visitor when my own daughters were raised to open their hearts and minds to other family posibilities. That's the two differences in Mike's family and mine. I'll still carry the hope but I won't put my heart out there anymore to be walked on by things some of his sons say or have said to me or to my daughters.
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